so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
