In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
We're not piercing ourselves today.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
