wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
