I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize