It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
At least make sure they are 18
Why
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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