okay pat passed out under dana's car
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
