i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Randomize
