I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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