This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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