My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
