id be glad to
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
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