She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Randomize
