We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
