U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
