I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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