I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
