Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
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