Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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