I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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