so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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