he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize