We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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