hell yes lets make some ravioli
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
