We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
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