So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I love having hate sex.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
