I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
