i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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