My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
