when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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