toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
