Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Randomize
