Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Randomize
