Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
