You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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