I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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