I smell stomach acid.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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