am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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