he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I think I sprained my soul last night
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
