Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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