My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
