Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
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