Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
