Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
