on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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