I didn't shave. On purpose
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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