like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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