The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
But break dance skills will only take you so far
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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