I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
