I could make wine with my vomit
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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