hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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